The Space Is Still There

Wednesday morning, 3am.

I roll over, and look out the window.

The stars are still there. This is good.

I roll back.

The empty space is still there. This is no good.

I reach out into the space, try and fill it with myself. It is not the same.

Nothing is the same.

I pull the pillow down to fill the space. It is not the same.

But it is... similar. The pillow still holds her scent. Perhaps it will be enough.

I hold the pillow close to myself, feel it grow warm with my touch.

It is not the same.

Her smile plays across the surface of my mind, dancing through my thoughts like she would.

I kick at the pillow, pushing it out of the bed. I roll over in a huff, eyes shut tight.

When they open, she is gone from my mind.

But so are the stars.

This is no good. No good. No.

Good Morning

I'm in the observation capsule when my watch beeps out the six am alert. I lazily move my hand over to silence the device while I float.

There's nothing to observe, of course. Just the stars. The same stars that were there yesterday, and the day before, and all hundred and eighty six previous days of the journey. There hasn't been a single visible phenomenon since the day we left. And no-one was in the observation capsule to watch our world shrink then, that's for sure.

Some of the people on the ship find it unsettling. The inky nothing. The idea that we're travelling at unimaginable speeds but seem to be standing still.

I find it peaceful.

I twist in the air, rolling to look out another window.  Different stars. Sirius twinkles happily at me. Hi Sirius.

I don't come here every day, but I try. Today will be busy, full of struggle and conflict and hard work. But not yet. Now it's just barely morning, and I can float and watch the stars not go by.

A hand snakes its way into mine, and gives it a gentle squeeze. The warmth is nice. I look down and see Diego.

"Sorry Claire. Battery 33 is developing a sputter." I smile at him, and nod. We slide towards the ladder and I feel gravity start to pull at me again.

Good morning stars. I'll see you tomorrow.